After two long years I was finally able to get my heart surgery done Monday July 21st, I couldn't be more grateful. Today marks exactly two weeks since the surgery and so far my heart couldn't be better. It has been quite the journey up to this point. I know a lot of you were unaware of some of the things I was dealing with and may not have even known I had a heart problem. I didn't tell many people and I was pretty good at hiding it. I tried to keep a smile on my face and stay positive through it all even though many days I would go home and break down because I didn't think I could take any more. My poor husband was the only one that really knew what I was going through and I was very lucky to have him there for me every step of the way. I know that it weighed on him and it definitely weighed on our marriage but we're so much stronger because of it. The past six months have been pretty miserable. I never would've guessed at 26 years old I would experience heart problems and especially a problem that would need to be surgically corrected.
Almost everyday I would wake up with extreme nausea. This began about 24 weeks before my surgery. At first, I thought it was caused from the vitamins I was taking. I had some other health issues I was trying to correct at the time. I started experiencing nausea just after my nurse put me on about 25 pills a day to correct some other problems I was dealing with. I called my nurse after about three days of nausea and told her what was happening. She informed me that a few things I was taking could cause nausea, she had me go off everything. She explained that she would gradually put me back on my vitamins one by one so we could determine what was causing the problem. After about 3 weeks had gone by nothing had changed. I was still so sick everyday. The vitamins were not the problem. I started doing research and the main thing that pulled up was pregnancy. I knew I was more then likely NOT pregnant, in fact I was told a few weeks previous there was a very slim chance I could even get pregnant with the results my nurse had found, that was a very hard thing for me to hear. Hopefully this is something that will be corrected in the near future. I thought maybe a miracle happened so I took a pregnancy test just to make sure. I was NOT pregnant, so I was able to rule that out.
The next day I had my doctor appointment with Dr. Hwang, he said nausea was a common symptom with my heart condition. I was unaware of that, this explained it all. This was the appointment where he decided surgery was necessary. My heart had gotten a lot worse and it was causing more symptoms, more then I even knew were possible. He told me if I ever wanted to enjoy life fully again surgery was the route to go. My quality of life was dimming pretty quickly so I was happy to hear there was a surgical procedure that would hopefully fix the problem for good. He gave me an 85% chance the surgery would correct the problem.
I scheduled my surgery that day for May 12th. It was about a month out. We had just signed up for an insurance plan through Obama Care about a month before. We hadn't received any insurance information yet but we were expecting it soon so we weren't worried. About a week before my scheduled surgery my insurance still hadn't come through. I contacted our insurance company and our insurance agent and got an emergency rush put on it. My doctor kept calling me in need of the information so they could submit it. I was working on my end with my insurance agent trying to get it through. After hours of being on the phone and constant prayers we got a call Friday May 9th saying it wasn't going to go through in time. I was so devastated. Being so sick all I could think is why would God want me to go through whole another month of feeling this way? I was becoming more and more fatigued everyday. Missing more and more work and feeling guilty every time I called in. I felt like they didn't understand my situation. I had to force myself to do everything I did. Working two jobs and trying to maintain a gym routine (which is a priority to me), while also trying to put all I could into my calling in the primary presidency, on top of everyday life was not easy.
Gradually my six days of exercise a week faded. I would go home and crash. The only way I would get myself to the gym is if I forced myself there but usually I dragged my way through my workout. I couldn't lay down without falling asleep. At times it took effort to move my fingers to send a text message. I didn't want to wait another day to have this problem corrected. I knew I did all I could, so there had to have been a reason why it didn't work out, I just didn't understand what that reason was.
The next morning I got up and decided to make the best of it. I went to the gym and continued my Saturday morning as usual. I had sharing time to prepare for primary that Sunday. It was Mother's Day Sunday so I put more preparation into my lesson then usual. I decided to go up to my parents house (which wasn't typical) I had about 250 flowers I was cutting out for my lesson, I knew this would take a while so I decided to go to Mom and Dad's where I would have some company while Danny was working. It was a typical Saturday at my parents house. My Dad was out doing yard work and my Mom was in the house cleaning. I sat at the kitchen table cutting out my flowers. I had been there about an hour when my Dad came inside and I heard him whispering to my Mom. He said, "Denise, will you keep a close eye on me, I'm having some really bad chest pain." My Dad is a tough cookie and he doesn't let on to anyone he is having pain unless it's something serious. My Dad not wanting me to hear there was a problem, I ran into the other room where he laid on the couch. I could tell he was in intense pain. I started quizzing his symptoms immediately. I have studied a lot about the heart with my condition so I knew my stuff. I suspected right away he was having a heart attack. I told him that but he didn't believe me. The symptoms increased so I insisted we take him to the hospital. My Dad being the stubborn guy that he is initially refused. My sister in law who was there, she is a nurse said she would go grab her equipment at home (just down the street) so she could take his blood pressure. Meantime, my Mom and I kept a close eye on my Dad. His symptoms began to get worse. I could tell it was starting to even concern him so he finally accepted that we take him to the hospital. Just before we left my sister in law came got back and took his blood pressure, sure enough it was abnormally high. I told my Dad again, "you're having a heart attack." My Mom and I got him in the car and rushed him to Timpanogos Hospital. My Mom parked while I helped my Dad into the emergency room. I told the nurse sitting at the front, "I think my Dad is having a heart attack." They were quick to respond and within a few minutes they had him all hooked up. My Mom and I just sat and watched it all, while notifying family. Within a few minutes they determined that he was having a heart attack and it appeared the main artery in his heart was blocked. This all happened within about an hour period. I was shaking because I was scared I might lose my Dad at this point. They rushed him in for emergency surgery. I will never forget the way felt when they told me to give him a kiss and tell him I loved him as they wheeled him away. I didn't know if i'd ever see him alive again. This was a rude awakening for me and the rest of my family. It was such a scary day and a reminder of how fragile life really is. I now understood why my surgery didn't work out. I was so thankful it didn't. I was able to be with my family and most importantly be there for my Dad. I don't know if he would've gone to the hospital if I wasn't there to encourage him to go. I would've most likely been home preparing to go in for my own heart surgery that upcoming Monday. It definitely all worked out the way it was supposed to.
My surgery got rescheduled for June 23rd. I anxiously waited whiled counting down the days. Again about a week before still NO insurance information. I started panicking again calling the insurance company while working with my insurance agent to make sure it was through in time. I was told it should be through by Wednesday so I tried not to worry too much. We had even signed up for a back up insurance plan just in case the original one didn't come through in time. Wednesday came and still nothing. I still had hope it would be okay and somehow it would work out in time. I had until Friday to make this happen. I did everything I could, Friday came and still no luck. Again, it didn't come through in time. This time I was furious. I've waited over two months now. Then to top it off, the nurse from Dr. Hwangs office called and was very firm with me. She said, "sorry but we can't reschedule your surgery until you have proof of insurance." She wouldn't even give me dates of when I could possibly reschedule and her tone of voice was not friendly. This just upset me more. I felt like she didn't understand, I was doing all I could to get my insurance through and it just wasn't happening. It made sense they didn't want me to reschedule just to have to cancel again, but I felt like they didn't believe I was really trying to get insurance. I mean, who's insurance takes over three months to go through? Mine does! I was so discouraged.
Monday the 23rd came, I was wishing I was on my way to the hospital instead of on my way to work. Later that morning, I got a call. My insurance FINALLY went through! Seriously though, the day of my surgery? If it would've come through one day sooner I could've had the surgery that day. There must of been something I was supposed to learn from all this. For whatever reason I was supposed to endure another month of these symptoms. To this day I'm not sure why. I rescheduled my surgery for a third time for July 21st. I now had confirmation of insurance so I knew unless something really unfortunate happened I would finally get my surgery done that day.
After months of restlessness the big day was finally approaching. Sunday night before my surgery I was able to get a blessing from my husband with my Dad's assistance. I was starting to get pretty nervous that night so it brought me a lot of comfort to be able to receive a priesthood blessing. The words that were spoken were incredible. Someone was very aware of my needs and my concerns. I thanked Danny for such an amazing blessing and he made sure to let me know those words weren't coming from him. The words spoken were no doubt inspired. I was so grateful for the power of the priesthood and a worthy husband who was able to give me such a special blessing that evening.
Finally July 21st arrived. Early that morning I started tossing and turning with anxiety and nerves. I was up and ready to go at 7am. I showered and packed all my stuff for my hospital stay. Danny took me to get breakfast at Kneaders around 9am and I wasn't able to eat again after that. We arrived at the hospital around 1:15pm. I got all registered and then they sent me to the cath lab where they hooked me up and I waited. Unfortunately Dr. Hwang had just started a surgery on an older gentlemen that was late for his appointment. They informed me I may have to wait a few hours but they would hopefully have me in at 3:30pm. I was disappointed, I wanted to get in and out so I could be DONE and have visitors later that night. My biggest fear was that my heart wouldn't act up for the doctors and after waiting all this time they would have to send me home. In order for them to perform this procedure my heart would have to be irregular or they wouldn't be able to find the area causing the problem. Fortunately, when they got me hooked up to the heart monitor I was surprised to see how bad my heart really was. (See pictures below) The nurse told me every other beat was irregular. My heart in fact kept setting the machine alarm off saying "PVCS to high per min." I was also having what they call bigemany's which is a string of PVC's, at times I would have five or six irregular heartbeats in a row before I would have a normal heartbeat. It was crazy to watch. So, I wasn't too concerned at this point, my heart was definitely acting up. Several hours later they came in to get me for surgery around 5pm. The surgery could potentially be a 6 hour+ long surgery but with my heart as bad as it was I was confident it wouldn't take them that long to find the problem. After I kissed Danny goodbye they wheeled me into surgery. They put me on this large table that had screens surrounding it. They applied these big patches that covered my entire back and hooked me up to more heart monitors. After about ten minutes of prepping the doctor confirmed I was having several bigemany's and as long as that didn't change when they put me under I would be good to go for surgery. They said a lot of times with this procedure they will put the patient under and it will relax them so much that the heart will start to pump correctly again. I was worried that could happen, but this was not a problem for me. They said my heart was very consistent and didn't change at all when they put me under. My surgery lasted about 2 1/2 hours which is about the minimum time for this procedure. I was grateful since I didn't get in until a lot later then expected. The next time I woke up, that I can remember, I was in the elevator on my way to my hospital room. By this time it was close to about 7:45pm. My parents and older sister arrived to see me about 15-20 minutes after I got back to my room. I remember seeing them but I vaguely remember conversation or how long they stayed. I was pretty unaware for several hours after I came out of surgery. Around 9:15pm my brother Dallin and his wife brought me dinner, I was so hungry since I hadn't drank or eaten anything since 9am that morning. They stayed and visited until after 10:00pm. I was still really sleepy and couldn't stay awake to hear all the conversations. I had to lay flat on my back for six hours after my surgery to prevent the possibility of blood clots. They made four small incisions on my neck and two incisions on my groin where they went through to get to my heart. I feel very blessed with the advancement of modern medicine, I am SO thankful it wasn't an open heart surgery. Around 11:30 or 12am I told Danny to go home and get some sleep. He originally planned to stay the night with me, I think he quickly realized that would be uncomfortable with a lot of interruptions. I didn't want him to lose a night of sleep to be with me so I was able to talk him into going home and getting a good night's rest and then coming back the next morning. The nurse was coming in every 30 minutes throughout the night to make sure blood clots weren't forming and to make sure when I fell asleep I didn't bend my legs. I had to lay completely flat on my back until 2:30am. I am usually a stomach or side sleeper and naturally keep my legs bent so this was not an easy task for me. I had to be reminded several times to keep my legs straight. I hardly slept until about 4am and woke up for the day around 7:30am.
Danny got back to the hospital the next morning around 10am to keep me company. He walked in with a big bouquet of roses, it was the cutest. We went on a walk around the halls to keep me from going crazy from laying in my bed. I had to wait for Dr. Hwang to come back to see me before he could tell me when I would be discharged. He came in around 12:00pm. He asked how I was feeling and gave me some instructions. He also listened to my heart and said it sounded perfect. He scheduled a follow up appointment with him on September 2nd to make sure all is healing well and to confirm that the surgery fixed the problem. Thus far, I haven't felt any problems so I am keeping my fingers crossed that won't change. After experiencing months of extreme, fatigue, nausea, coughing, shortness of breath, heart flutters, chest pains, tingling, lightheadedness, eyes blacking out (thankfully I never passed out), and my heart feeling like it "stopped" several times a day I couldn't have been more happy to wake up the next day not feeling these symptoms. If you look at the pictures below you can see how my heart was pumping before my surgery a few hours later it was pumping perfectly. I look forward to having a normal quality of life again. I can't even put into words the difference my heart feels now. I taught sharing time in primary yesterday and I usually get nervous right before I get up which makes my heart way worse, but it was normal and it felt amazing! It was so weird not to feel it all over the place.
I am now almost fully recovered!! The recovery process was a bit more challenging then I expected but I am getting around pretty well now. I had a few blood clot scares that made us nervous but so far so good! I will continue to take blood thinners for another 15 days. The incisions are still tender and I still have small amounts of pain in my leg and burning in my chest from when he cauterized the tissue around my heart (it feels like severe heart burn, but it is literally heart burn haha) but other then that I feel SO much better. Unfortunately, I have a few other health problems I am working on correcting to be able to get completely back to normal, but having my heart fixed is a huge step in the right direction. I see my nurse tomorrow to get more blood work done and hopefully I will get my other health problems resolved soon.
I am going to attempt getting back into a gym routine TODAY! Wahoo! I am so excited to be able to get back into a regular gym routine with more energy and strength. I will no longer have to worry about passing out! I look forward to returning to a healthy lifestyle and getting back to workouts that I haven't been able to do in months!
Thank you to all my family and friends that have been nothing but supportive during this time in my life. I appreciate the love and comfort I have felt from each of you. Some of you were a strength to me more then you will ever realize. I am so grateful for those who reached out and understood the battle I was fighting. This has been a huge trial in my life that is hopefully in the past for good. It has definitely tested my faith, strength, and patience. I am a stronger person today for having to overcome these things and I am grateful for that. My eyes have been opened and I've realized it's easy to take for granted a healthy body. If you're healthy embrace it, love it, and thank the Lord everyday for it. Take care of yourself! Being the busy body I am it makes me appreciate a healthy body so much more. I am very active, I love sports, working out, dancing, and I'm always on the go healthy or not. Health problems can change your life in so many ways, I have become much more sympathetic to those who struggle with their own health, it is NOT easy. Prayers go out to those who continue to struggle with their health or trials of their own. There are so many people fighting a silent battle, I realize this now more then ever before and I try to remind myself of this daily. I have learned to be kind ALWAYS, you never know the pain behind someone else's smile. Love you all! Happy Monday:)
(Sorry about the spacing! I'm still not very good at this blogging thing... so I'm not sure why it put huge spaces in between some of the paragraphs??)
Thank you for reading!
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| Leaving for the hospital |
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| Kneaders breakfast, love their oatmeal:) |
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| Got me all hooked up and ready for surgery |
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| Just waiting for the doctor |
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| Last kiss before they wheeled me away |
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| About an hour after surgery. Dal & Jess came to visit, I was still so out of it. |
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| Morning after surgery. |
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| This is all I drank! Hospital Cranberry juice is the best! Mixed with sprite=AMAZING! |
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| A few hours before I got released. Thank you Danny for the beautiful roses & my older sister for the gorgeous lilies. Definitely helped brighten up my room & my day:) |
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| The way my heart was pumping before my surgery. |
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| My heart finally pumping normal again! |
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| Thank you for all the beautiful flowers. I love them! |
The bracelet my Mom & Dad got me. This is something I will treasure forever.
"Elephant Tears"
This represents a story about an elephant I read about a few months ago. The elephant was chained up, starved, and abused for 50 years. I love animals so much & I am so sensitive to any cruelty they might receive, this totally broke my heart. The elephant cried tears when he was finally rescued. This story touched me so much. My Mom (knowing this story) gave me this bracelet after my surgery and said to me, "you finally broke out of your chains," It brought tears to my eyes, this is so special to me. I will remember & cherish this forever.
Watch the story here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DhrjTFSDqTU
This represents a story about an elephant I read about a few months ago. The elephant was chained up, starved, and abused for 50 years. I love animals so much & I am so sensitive to any cruelty they might receive, this totally broke my heart. The elephant cried tears when he was finally rescued. This story touched me so much. My Mom (knowing this story) gave me this bracelet after my surgery and said to me, "you finally broke out of your chains," It brought tears to my eyes, this is so special to me. I will remember & cherish this forever.
Watch the story here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DhrjTFSDqTU
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